Thesis Dedication

Since I will be defending my thesis next Wednesday, I would like to finally share my dedication with you. It has been included in my thesis for all posterity in the following manner:

I dedicate my Master’s thesis to my beloved parents, Alex and Ildi, and my loving, tenacious sister, Julie. You guys are nuts but, then, so am I. I love you!

To the continent of Australia: if ever a place was a manifestation of my spirit, you’re it. Thank you for embracing me for the most exciting and fulfilling 6 months of my life.

For Geegal, an Aboriginal term meaning “shelter” and my home in Sydney for half a year. For all my Geegalians, especially Alana, Andy Casino, Andy Dubbo, Antti, Arlette, Brett, Carlos, Celia, Cristy, French Sophie, German Matthias, Jamie, Javi, Marc, Mexican David, Michael, Mills, Ming Lu, Paula, Rudy, Simon, Sophia, and Vern. I will always love you and I will always be a Geegalian.

Finally, to my favorite director of all time, Baz Luhrmann: I have experienced so many wonderful emotions and learned so much from your films. However, “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.” – Moulin Rouge!

Friday or Bust? Friday a Bust.

Ben in healthier days

I got a call from my boyfriend at 5:30 pm today sounding just horrible. Poor guy is sick with the flu or something horrendous. To top that off he had to go to the hospital yesterday after a wire snapped and struck his right eyeball. Four scratches to the cornea. I feel really bad for him, especially 'cause he looks so forward to the weekends. Me, too. I'm bummed 'cause this'll be one of the last weekends to spend time together before I head to Europe. Plus I don't have a desire to go out without him. So I'm at home for the night. Gonna take it easy and look forward to tomorrow. I feel selfish and guilty because part of me wants him to come hang out tomorrow even if he's on his death bed. I truly hope he feels better so I can at least see him. Otherwise I'll have to fashion myself a noose out of the 3rd floor window... I'm so bored with myself. Me, myself and I are boring each other!

Insomnia Breeds Hatred

I cannot sleep, it's 2:00 am. I have spent the last hour reminiscing about the 2 or 3 people who have treated me like trash in my professional life. All I feel is a flood of anger drowning me and I wish I could act upon it. What good does it do to torture myself this way? None. Those bitches probably don't even remember my name and yet, years later, I am still fuming. I can't help it-- it actually feels good to be so angry for once. Doesn't happen often. I can't wait to get the chance to stand up for myself in some future situation. I have never had the ability to do that in my lifetime. I hate confrontation and I hardly ever get angry. But, when I do, watch out. What's been pent up for years is unleashed and shows no mercy.

Girl, Interrupted

I have been nuts recently and I think it's because of all of this change occurring. I like change but I simply don't do well with it initially. I wish I weren't so emotionally erratic... Boy, this is a boring post!

Oxygen Tanked

Bar tab
$15

Hotel room
$100

Having a boyfriend who belongs to the Air Supply fan club?
Disturbing


P.S. I love you anyway, God help me!

Movie Snob

I have been a total movie snob the past couple of days. I just finished watching Brokeback Mountain and Capote. They were both very good, especially considering all the schlock that’s been out in theaters this past year. It’s almost too bad that Brokeback received so much hype because, inevitably, hype (whether pro or anti) ends up negatively coloring your reception of the film. I didn’t want to rent Brokeback because I was sick of hearing about it. When I did, I actually respected it in spite of its hype. I thought Capote was an even more meaty, thought-provoking film. I recommend both.

This second paragraph is somewhat related (even though it is a personal tirade). Simply put: I am sick to my ears and eyeballs with all this macho, ignorant, sexist, racist and homophobic bullshit that seems to be a popular pastime with Americans (especially). “I won’t see Brokeback Mountain ‘cause it’s about two fags.” “They’re n---ers, what do you expect?” “The old ball and chain is such a pain in my ass.” Football, football, football… hockey, hockey, hockey… blah, blah blah… blaah, blaaaah, BLAH! News flash: You’re not cool. You’re just a pathetic, ignorant asshole.

God, I am not a P.C., card-carrying member of the ACLU. In fact, many of those people and they’re agendas make me just as angry. But, damnit, I feel as if I’m being backed into their corner just because I think and act like a decent human being. Why is being civilized too much to ask? Why do I seem to be the only one who cares about this shit?

I HATE when you write me off as some liberal bed-wetter and refuse to listen to what I say because I stand up for what’s right. This is the only time I can say the following with 100 % certainty: I’m not the problem, you are. And you know who you are.

P.S. Maybe I just need to hang out with different people…

In Poor Taste

Have you heard of this new movie United 93 which has previews showing in most theaters across the U.S.? You guessed it; it’s about the plane bound for D.C. on 9/11 that crashed into a field in Pennsylvania. To me, this is really sick. Not only is it in poor taste to create a film about that tragedy in an entertainment medium such as mainstream film, but some greedy bastards are using this horrific memory to make money for themselves. I know, I know. You’ll say “Well, they’ve made tons of movies about tragedies and no one’s complained before.” That’s true but it’s a bullshit argument in this case. You know and I know that 9/11 is a different ball of wax. It did and still does incite a new, profound and inexplicable reaction in all of us that’s simply too sacred to be f---ed with by Hollywood sleazebags for profit. In my opinion, you have to be sick to pay money to see this movie in a theater and even sicker to be responsible for its existence.

Chicago

A couple of photos from our trip to Chicago. If you are in the area and want great deep dish pizza, go to Due's. One slice and you're out!